Heyz... been a long time ive really posted... kinda of busy these 2 weeks with projects... soo can't really type any shit.. but seriously i dun think anyone really reads my blog anyway...
its a dead city...
haha but still im going to type anyway... the only few lazy ways to improve my shagged english...
o ya today got a very fucked up teacher... wah lao her thinking is soo freaking DEAD...
first few lessons was she can't accept answers that is correct that is not answer in the way of the textbook... in another words she wants txtbk ANSWERS!!! WTF ??
its like (e.g
{my answer: 1+3=4} ) she say wrong? WTF right?
aiyo dun know wat she thinks.. i dun know.. because i study in my own way of understanding.. i understand.. people understand.. can already.. but i hope those who marks my final paper is not her.. knn she dun even know english
afew days ago.. she wrote ' electrons will not be drifted.......' i was like.. WTf my english soo lousy liaoz.. i want to improve.. soo i accidently said.. teacher english mistake..
then i point to 'will not be drifted'... she then say where wrong all those fucking crap..
WTF then ontop of that say my english lousy?? HELLO!!! even if my english is lousy.. i also know behind BE is not a past tense... or will not drifted or something.. knn say my english lousy infront of the whole class? she end up kanna laugh by the whole class..
dun care her liaoz..
these whole sem.. i didn't really paid much effort in my classes.. and i dun know how i survive thr the whole ordeal.. <--- haha i called it an ordeal...
seriouly i must be really thankful to everything.. even if im a free-thinker... i know it sounds alittle christian to be saying all these.. but.. well
i really must be thankful to god<--- not meaning to jesus or all those...
to wat i believe is there is a god up there which use to explain the unexplained...
its just like.. music genre or a heading to group stuff...
well must be really thankful.. cause people believe in such stuff in turn to look for hope..
well im feeling low or theres like not much of a hope in certain things or different aspect of life.. we normally turn to these soo called 'gods' well i do too.. haha i go with desmond to these temples to pray.. in search of hope...
i hope to get lucky and everything... i even hope that time can just go back to the past...
i even hope that my life can improve by alittle each day...
well after those praying.. i believed that my little hopes of every little things do come in someway or another.. which we don't know... even if its not true... we always bluff ourself that it will come soon... or just the time is not ripe.. or bluff ourself that this is how god work...
haha its not im condamning anything... just feels like typing it out..
well 365 days at home.. when u can find time to type soo much rubbish or concept that u had within u..?
learning to cherish things that ive now is something ive learned 7months ago..
wat takes 7months for me to realise is something that i always dun want to mention or say...
7months is a long time.. i know...
7months been into alot.. like trying to get back into my past...
like trying to be the o'godly HoNoR
or the captain of the team..
and even banana god <--- well its the best
till now none of them is been successful or been happy in doing it..
Aspect of life in the past:
Gaming always im the best.. ill play and put my very best..
im called honor is not because im honourable in my games or wat..
its cause using the nick honor makes people know that its u.. the very u that sends shiver in all gamers spine.. or their cpu LOLX...
(well but now? ive given up gaming 8months ago... now i doubt i can pick it up again by any means... even in dota or watever.. the long invinicable micro or the speed of controls? and the killing instincts? all gone.. gone... no more... sean dun ask me y... nl dun ask me y i got so lousy im just lousy for giving up wat i love most... gaming... ive given up tat... and gaming given up on me... no more feelings for gaming.. can't feel it anymore)
Soccer... haha thats in the past already.. i dun have the passion like wat ivan said b4... ive lost the passion to play the game... instead of loving the game or anything.. ive just stop improving and got worse by the day... forget it.. just forget it... feels like playing but dun have the spirit to play..
at first ive got this wonderful job in whitesands...
i wonder at first... i can earn soo much and get stuff while im there
ha. ha. ha. wishful thinking..
commitment is something that its not in my blood
delication is something that ive lost
my own life is something that ive wasted
lazyiness is something ive gained after losing soo much
(wow this is such a good poem or watever its called)
i noticed im soo creative at nite.. only at this time.. LOLx
well ive tot of having a blog for me to post weekly stories of bordom.. where people put their heading and i type according.. depending on how i wanted the story to be...
haha little ways to improve my english.. how can 1 be soo thristing for knowledge after they been soo lazy in recent days?
no sense no sense..
i can see my mind is already all over the place...
the words that is coming out here is sorta of all over the place too
well i should do a little summary:
wat i really wants to say is... why do i have a feeling i lost something important when ive lost nothing...? the most important thing ive lost is like 7months ago... but this time i can really feel the weight? maybe i lost too much even mj LOLX!!!!
seriously if u ask me y i dun want make an effort then?
well i told my little slave y...
u know.. for that little day of urs ive planned for like 6 months...
ive convince people into teaching me
ive practised for like a month.. learning different tricks
what i want to present to u.. its the very thing that ive long wanted to have it back...
a moment of magic... a moment of promises... a moment of longing
but in the week b4 that day.. or maybe 3days b4 the day... u've made me changed my mind..
well i dun know wats in my mind but its just something that ive noticed tat it wasted my planning for soo long..
learning to give up and release maybe its the process of 7months..
haha...
o ya ive looked at my bro grad pictures which we took at the studio.. man i hate my own pics.. soo yuck..the make up is nice.. i just dun like my own facial features...
well maybe soon i going to pray again.. hope that maybe someday its going to head for the better
despire and dismay.. and
something ive long wanted
is to go to sleep right now.. soo im ending it right here right now... tata